I sent this out in the Daily Raw Inspiration the other day….
It sounds like Raw Alien Nation, and sometimes it feels like we are that, doesn’t it! I was hiking along today with a view of the town spread out below, and smells of breakfast wafting through the air. And I was hit with a sudden feeling of loneliness.
Somehow I don’t feel like I’m fully a part of this world. It made me a little sad for my children, that we aren’t part of the fabric of society into which so much food is woven on almost every level.
And then I took a deep breath and enjoyed the sunlight and felt, from that lovely mountain, that we really are part of something, a movement of change that will ultimately make our world a better place!
I received many lovely emails of connection to this. This one is meant to be shared…..
From a reader:
Oh my goodness, Jinjee, yes, I know just what you mean.
But as one recovering from a horrible binge yesterday, that smell of oil and butter is so deceptive. Lurking 2 steps down from that gorgeous smell is
gallstones, pancreatic cancer and liver tumours. I know you already know this and so do I, but I know exactly what you mean about those smells.
Like an alcoholic, when we “start feeling good again” those smells seem so irresistable. I pray to the Lord that before I ever take that first bite of
rancid oil/fat again that smells so irresistable at the time, that I remember how awful I feel today after yesterday’s horrible binge on mac and cheese (oh how awful, Jinjee. The thrill lasted 60 seconds and now I am left with DAYS if not WEEKS of trying to recover from it) – – – .
Listen to what happened.
I was feeling GREAT yesterday afternoon.
Thought: oh, have some whole wheat macaroni to use up – might as well use that slab of cheese (another family member’s unwanted leftovers!!) – that’s all I’ll have (the food addict’s LIE to herself, right?)! I was feeling a little hungry, confident, like I could handle it. (Lies of the devil. I tell you, lies of the devil, has to be.)
Listen to this awful binge. (I feel like i’m at confessional with you at the moment but here goes) :
– a huge bowl of mac and cheese (melted organic cheese over the macaroni) — that went too fast — wasn’t satisfied — so…
– Then had a can of organic baked beans.
– Then half 2/3 a large chocolate bar (we both know how awful chocolate is. My God!! thats a whole other story)
– Then cried on a friend’s shoulder and went out and had battered sausage, egg-fried rice and red sauce –
– 2 cream filled donuts, 2 bear claw type things –
– 2/3 a box of ritz crackers with some cream cheese.
I ROLLED into bed. Yes, I thought surely this time I was going to die. In sheer misery.
This morning – woke up like a drunkard – bleary eyed, staggering around for a while.
Oh Jinjee, I know that breakfast smell you talked about so well from the malls and people’s houses when I walk by on my walks.
Although I hate how I am feeling today, I always want to do something to carry this horrible reminder with me somehow so I will NEVER take for granted feeling good again.
I know what to do. I just didn’t do it! Why do I always BLANK OUT that bingeing will NEVER produce anything but MISERY????
This world, Jinjee. It’s not the norm!! It THINKS it is – it SAYS it is – the advertisements use these skinny perfect girls to say it is. But it’s not. IT’s not at all how God intended man to eat.
It’s a lonely feeling, smelling their cooked food in the morning, but nothing will ever make us feel well except raw.
I do RAW RAW COOKED now. Raw breakfast, raw lunch, but cooked low-fat or fat free evening (when doing what I’m supposed to). Works so perfectly for me.
Sorry for the big long letter — but just wanted you to know — you are not alone!!! I am right there with you !!!!! Yes, that breakfast smell ! ! ! It promises EVERYTHING, doesn’t it? And it delivers nothing !!! Or, at least, only horrible things. I am training myself to enjoy the smell – and like the old saying: “Let’s not, but say we did.” thing. The smell is the ONLY thing we can enjoy about those cooked breakfasts without it ruining us.
(You can use any part of this letter you want if it helps anybody to see what they NEVER want to do and how serious the problem is) Bingeing is NEVER worth it. NEVER in a million years. I have been guilted into “never waste anything”. I am trying to learn throw it the heck away, do whatever, just don’t KILL MYSELF trying to eat it. That constant lie we always fall for: “Just eat some more of this – or try some of that – then you’ll be satisfied.” NEVER happens! That’s all a lie!!! It’s like a druggie chasing the dragon !!! But we NEVER get that “food buzz” that satisfies. All we get is bloated, sick, depressed and fat ! ! ! !
Sorry you caught me on a binge-recovery day. I hope all is fine for you and your family. Thank you for all your wonderful newsletters. I always appreciate them and learn a lot from you.
….Here is what I emailed her back….
Thank you for sharing your passionate thoughts! This intense anger and indignation can be so helpful in creating a huge, meaningful “why” that sticks with you forever, becomes part of who you are, thereby helping you to stay your true path more easily, longer, more often.
There are many great moments of truth and ways to stay the path. For many people a 100% raw diet IS the solution. For me, it was the missing piece of the puzzle that allowed me to have abundant health for many years.
But 20 years later after falling back in to food addiction, I was finally helped on a really deep core level by a combination of Emotional Brain Training (EBT) which uses the latest in brain science to help people become free from compulsive eating — and a high raw diet — a combination that I’m bringing to others now with The Joy Foods Diet.
My heart goes out to you and anyone struggling valiantly – as you are – as I have – against this disease. You are staying positive and passionate. That kind of positivity and passion helped me so much as I started to use the tools of EBT which totally support you to follow through on your commitment to your health, day by day, hour by hour, with joy and love and connection, guiding you in becoming a good parent to yourself, giving you the tools to organize your experience, creating neural pathways from trauma and stress back to security and joy!
We’re still seeking a few more members to fill out our new EBT Telegroup currently forming at http://JoyFoodsDiet.com
I would love for you to be a part of this group as I know from blissful experience how wonderfully and magically it will gently and lovingly bring you to the state of freedom you so deserve.
Check it out and if it speaks to you, let me know!